Updating my soul

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All the doctors change every week, if you come in at the end of week and spend 12 days there, you have literally 3 different versions of the same doctor, in my dads case, he had 9.

Oncology, Neurology and what they consider like a GP or overall MD.

Your love, your strength, your Light was and continues to be felt in my soul.

Thank you for holding my heart thru this leg of my journey. The hospital he was admitted to, known as the best hospital in the area, has this thing called “the doctor of the week” program.

A weight was lifted off my heart to know he was doing well…what a relief!

Both my dad and Carla seem to believe that my future holds some wonderful business prospects…something completely fulfilling to my soul’s purpose..which won’t hurt my bank account either.

Of course, I have been talking like that since I arrived and I think this is the first time he really felt the truth of what I was saying and even found it something to smile about.

However, getting to this single moment has been one hellofa chaotic journey.

I have become rather indecisive on whether to continue updating through this blog, make another, or start an entirely separate website devoted to the tiny house (I’ve done all three). But how could we live with ourselves knowing the either one of these furballs would have lived a life in a kennel or at the humane society in a cage.

Until the day after the news, suddenly all these tests, all the treatment plans started being taken off the table until the only thing left was a “light dose” of chemo, not designed to treat the cancer, but help reduce the fluid weeping out of his cancer. I have always felt blessed about my care and the absolute truth in communication from my cancer team, this journey raised that feeling to the 100th degree. I had to pull every psychic resource I had at my dispose and started really listening to what the docs weren’t saying.

My dad is at the end of this road, no more testing or treatment is going to do anything to help, his body cannot handle any more toxins going in.

The once benign tumor of 3 years ago, was now full-blown stage 4 cancer that had metastasized to his liver, brain and spine.

He now had several tumors in his lung and it is the kind that weeps and even the fluid is malignant.

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